xenologer: (bye bye)
Logicgate and I have decided that my personal polysphere is basically Paradigm City.

Here. You'll want to play this in another tab.

Nobody in our poly/kinky/gamer/burlesque monkeysphere appears to have any memory of their past. If they are smart enough to figure out how to operate cell phones and each other's genitals, they can have something of civilization. People can survive without knowing what did or didn't happen in the past. And each day they try their hardest to do just that.

Logicgate was concerned that because she has memories, she will be murdered. But I reminded her that she has the option of achieving mecha apotheosis instead, which is the option she is choosing.

Me? I perform a much-needed job in this city of amnesia. We even made a list of all my (pro bono) clients, and it was surprisingly long. Embarrassingly long. Such a long list, growing name by name without me noticing. Looks like even I live day to day playing out this role, the role of Paradigm City negotiator, without any memory of how I got here. But memories, like nightmares, sometimes come when you least expect them, these memories that tell me I am this person we call blueXenologer.



No matter what, no one on this planet can possibly know everything... no one. Just because it comes naturally does not mean it's my destiny. When others turn away from the lessons of their own pasts, do I always need to be the one to remind them? When they turn their eyes away from their own memories, leaving them in the dark that causes humans such instinctive fear, can I conquer that fear for them?

No. No one can conquer another's fears. Even when it comes as naturally as opening an umbrella in the rain, even if my memories tell me that it is what I have always done, people are not ruled by their memories. We have choices. Some people like to stand in the rain without an umbrella. That's what it means to live free.
xenologer: (do not even)
TW: Game of Thrones is 40% good and 60% racist hilaribad

We've had convos in my journal before about racist Eurocentric fantasy and so I obviously knew what I was getting into with Game of Thrones but oh my god

nobody warned me about the "thank you" thing

"I do not know how to say thank you in Dothraki." "There is no word for thank you in Dothraki."

I mean aside from her clearly beginning the process of civilizing the hypersexual violent darkie savage with her magic white poontang of compassion and reason... can we just spend a minute and sit with THE DOTHRAKI DO NOT HAVE A WORD FOR THANK YOU

they do not have that



I like the female characters, and knew I would. It's just pretty clear that they're only for white people. ALSO I get the feeling that with all George RR Martin's ingenuity with tormenting his characters, the only misery he can think of for women is sexual violence just over and over and over. I keep wanting to get myself to a place of willful enjoyment, but all I can think about are the following two things:

1. It's pretty sad that fantasy boards that are blatant rip-offs of this setting and plot constitute progress in the land of Misogynist Whitelandia roleplaying. How fuckin' sad.

2. the dothraki do not have a word for thank you

Thank goodness for the Lannisters. I don't think I could deal with this without their smarmy behinds. No word for thank you. What the shit. halp
xenologer: (vagina)
In Chonburi with my friend Logicgate who is getting bottom surgery because she's a fuckin' gangster who is doing an awesome thing.

The flights were great, because international flights are great when your baseline is USA domestic flying. On our last leg from Qatar we had this guy sitting in the aisle seat and I was at the window. He drank enough double gin and tonics that I don't know how many he drank. Sometimes he ordered coffee, so I figured that meant he'd at least had some things which weren't alcohol, but NOPE. Turns out his coffee had brandy in it. Soooo he just got progressively more and more hammered (in fact, Logicgate has dubbed him Captain Hammered), and got proportionately more obnoxious.

At the start of the flight he was offering to help us stow luggage and stuff just because he was on the aisle and is a dude and we're not so sure. By the end of the flight he was poking Logicgate and narrating her responses to the movie we were watching (seriously, telling her "you are laughing!" when she is laughing is not useful data sir but thank you) and when she was not responding with enough attention he switched his focus to me or something?

He was telling her to smile and she didn't respond, and since she was being my social bulletsponge by being physically between me and other people (I FUCKING HATE BEING TOUCHED Y'ALL), I chimed in there with, "She'll smile when she wants to. No, she'll smile when she feels like it." He got desperate and tried to reach across her to me. I don't know if he wanted to touch my face or what but I looked over and there was just this hand all of a sudden like an object in a 3D movie flying at the screen for no reason and she deflects his hand and I am sitting there like "WHAT IS GOING ON."

We were watching Tangled, because one does, and I shut my window shade because I had a glare on my screen. He told me to open it. He didn't ask; he told me. Now, I would accept that this is a language barrier thing because he had a fairly thick accent and so allowances must be made for less than perfect fluency, but if his fluency dropped it was because he'd gotten plastered on the flight, so I just told him, "No." He repeated his imperative and I said, "No. I am watching a movie." Because, sir, if you try to make me choose between your interests and Flynn Rider, I am sorry but Flynn is a fine piece of computer-generated mancandy and you will not be happy with the outcome of that ultimatum.

So that was very silly!

The hotel is nice, and there are plenty of places nearby to eat. We also met other people who either are here for surgery or are here for a reunion since they met on previous occasions for the same thing. They are AWESOME. Logicgate observed that selection bias is on our side here in a big way since the clinic has a lot of patients staying here basically all the time, but I am just delighted that we had random people come colonize our dinner table and hang out with us.

We have a common area on our floor with four chairs and a little table and suchforth, and I definitely plan on camping out there on the regular. If I want to just read quietly by myself, I will do it there so that hopefully I will attract others to use the common space because that is what they are for. Then we can all get our introvert on when necessary without actually needing to hide in our rooms. That is my plan.

After dinner, more hilarity ensued.

I complimented one of the hotel employees on her shoes (they were these gorgeous red-bottomed stilettos), and she did a little dance in them to show she could, and then TOOK THEM OFF AND GOT ME TO WEAR THEM.

I was figuring she was just showing me, but no, she really wanted me to put them on.

So here's what's ridiculous.

She looked at my feet and knew that our feet were the exact same size. I cannot even estimate how well something will fit my feet by looking and she was just like yep you should wear my shoes and let's see you walk in them! so I did.

They were super comfortable! Mostly though, like.... omg how did she know my shoe size?!

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