I don't think it's a good idea to live each day as though it's your last. But I do think it's important to remember that we never have as much time as we think we do.
There's been a death in my religious circle, and while I didn't know her, there is this proximity to mortality that gets you thinking, you know? You get within the blast radius and stuff starts coming to mind.
I don't live each day as though it's my last. If I did, I'd be racking up insane credit card charges to visit everybody I know online before I go, taking time off work to go to Japan to see the Takarazuka Revue, and robbing banks so that I could give all the money to charities I care about (so that I can simultaneously build a legacy on philanthropy and crime!)
I don't like putting things off, though.
I work a job that may or may not have awesome long-term prospects for me, and may or may not actually be stable. But I'm where I want to be right now, and if I knew my time was coming, at least I'd be able to tell myself I wasn't sitting in some veal-pen for wage slaves waiting for the time when I'd have the money and time available to really do something I felt needed to be done. At least I'll know that I didn't waste time putting off what was really important.
As far as my personal life, I live with a wonderful man whom I would marry in a heartbeat if it wouldn't break my heart to have my little straight-pride parade in a state where a woman wouldn't have the recognized right to marry me no matter how right we were together. As it is, I want to have what legal recognition I can get, and I want it now. I can't have it now, and this is the one area of my life where I face insurmountable delays due to external circumstances. He needs to remain a dependent student until the end of the year, and it's only after that that we can get on the same insurance.
It bothers me, though. It bothers me because if something were to happen, I would regret that it had never happened. I don't like leaving room for regret. I want to take every opportunity for happiness that comes my way, and I don't want to miss anything.
Plans. I am capable of planning things in exhaustive detail, an ability to which anybody who has watched me masterminding various social situations can attest. I just don't like making plans, because making plans means investing time and effort now in a future that isn't guaranteed. I don't want to plan to be happy. I want to be happy.
I don't want to plan to have a life. I want to have a life.
I don't want to plan to make Brian my legal partner. I want to have it now.
I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket; it's my bar of chocolate! Give it to me now!
You get the idea; I don't want all my joy to be in the future.
Plans are such difficult things, and it's always later than you think.
There's been a death in my religious circle, and while I didn't know her, there is this proximity to mortality that gets you thinking, you know? You get within the blast radius and stuff starts coming to mind.
I don't live each day as though it's my last. If I did, I'd be racking up insane credit card charges to visit everybody I know online before I go, taking time off work to go to Japan to see the Takarazuka Revue, and robbing banks so that I could give all the money to charities I care about (so that I can simultaneously build a legacy on philanthropy and crime!)
I don't like putting things off, though.
I work a job that may or may not have awesome long-term prospects for me, and may or may not actually be stable. But I'm where I want to be right now, and if I knew my time was coming, at least I'd be able to tell myself I wasn't sitting in some veal-pen for wage slaves waiting for the time when I'd have the money and time available to really do something I felt needed to be done. At least I'll know that I didn't waste time putting off what was really important.
As far as my personal life, I live with a wonderful man whom I would marry in a heartbeat if it wouldn't break my heart to have my little straight-pride parade in a state where a woman wouldn't have the recognized right to marry me no matter how right we were together. As it is, I want to have what legal recognition I can get, and I want it now. I can't have it now, and this is the one area of my life where I face insurmountable delays due to external circumstances. He needs to remain a dependent student until the end of the year, and it's only after that that we can get on the same insurance.
It bothers me, though. It bothers me because if something were to happen, I would regret that it had never happened. I don't like leaving room for regret. I want to take every opportunity for happiness that comes my way, and I don't want to miss anything.
Plans. I am capable of planning things in exhaustive detail, an ability to which anybody who has watched me masterminding various social situations can attest. I just don't like making plans, because making plans means investing time and effort now in a future that isn't guaranteed. I don't want to plan to be happy. I want to be happy.
I don't want to plan to have a life. I want to have a life.
I don't want to plan to make Brian my legal partner. I want to have it now.
I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket; it's my bar of chocolate! Give it to me now!
You get the idea; I don't want all my joy to be in the future.
Plans are such difficult things, and it's always later than you think.