Me.

Activists are frequently asked to be ready to give up anything and everything they love personally for "the cause" (whatever that might be). This is not sustainable.

Activists are supposed to ignore their creative passions, ignore crimes against them by their fellow activists because of race or gender, allow themselves to be used for a good cause and bled dry and discarded. This is not sustainable.

Do what you have to in order to keep your own fire burning. Self-care matters, because sometimes we are all we have to give, and we shouldn't waste it. Be well, be good to yourself, and if you're ready to jump into a fight at some point in the future, rest assured there'll always be one. :)

-Present Me.

Someone should have told me this, but the people who got me into rabblerousing were too busy trying to get the best use out of me they could. I had to learn it later. I don't regret anything I've done and I'm tremendously proud of the work I sacrificed to contribute to, but my decisions look different now than they did then. That's probably a good thing.

IM convo from earlier:


(01:48:07 AM) John: So, what will you do with all your free time?
(01:48:14 AM) John: Bask for a while?
(01:48:14 AM) Me: Fight the man.
(01:48:16 AM) Me: See a doctor.
(01:48:19 AM) Me: RP.
(01:48:26 AM) Me: That's my list.
(01:49:00 AM) John: Good list. I dig it.

The Gratitude Project was begun several years ago by a LiveJournal user called estaratshirai . The rules are simple. Every day between Lammas (August 1st) and Mabon (the Autumnal Equinox) one must find something to be grateful for in life. No repeats - one can be grateful to people more than once, but it has to be for different reasons.

Monday:

I am grateful to Pedialyte for making sure I don't get low on electrolytes and have a heart attack. Thanks, Pedialyte, even if you are way too slimy-feeling in my mouth somehow.

Tuesday:

I am grateful to Filament Magazine for... existing. Hooray for a women's magazine produced by feminists with what women actually want in mind (so bite me, Cosmo, and your endlessly-repeated 100-something ways to be worthy of a man).

The Gratitude Project was begun several years ago by a LiveJournal user called estaratshirai . The rules are simple. Every day between Lammas (August 1st) and Mabon (the Autumnal Equinox) one must find something to be grateful for in life. No repeats - one can be grateful to people more than once, but it has to be for different reasons.

The people at Panda Express in Bloomington who are super nice to canvassers and from whom you should buy lots of food. Seriously, those guys are so nice to us.

The Gratitude Project was begun several years ago by a LiveJournal user called estaratshirai . The rules are simple. Every day between Lammas (August 1st) and Mabon (the Autumnal Equinox) one must find something to be grateful for in life. No repeats - one can be grateful to people more than once, but it has to be for different reasons.

Thanks to the people I meet at the door who always make sure that I leave with water (and special thanks to the awesome lady in Bloomington whose name I never learned who gave us a box of cookies and a whole sliced ice-cold watermelon when it was 100* out today).

The Gratitude Project was begun several years ago by a LiveJournal user called estaratshirai . The rules are simple. Every day between Lammas (August 1st) and Mabon (the Autumnal Equinox) one must find something to be grateful for in life. No repeats - one can be grateful to people more than once, but it has to be for different reasons.

Thanks to the people I meet at the door who always make sure that I leave with water (and special thanks to the awesome lady in Bloomington whose name I never learned who gave us a box of cookies and a whole sliced ice-cold watermelon when it was 100* out today).

The Gratitude Project was begun several years ago by a LiveJournal user called estaratshirai . The rules are simple. Every day between Lammas (August 1st) and Mabon (the Autumnal Equinox) one must find something to be grateful for in life. No repeats - one can be grateful to people more than once, but it has to be for different reasons.

I am grateful for the people I work with, who have stuck with me while I learn some difficult new skills to cope with unpredictability and impermanence.

Today I had an excellent surprise. Somebody had a great inspirational quote on their door when I knocked (the one about how we do nobody any favors by diminishing our abilities or accomplishments and shining less brightly than we could), and that made me smile. But there was also a person-sized (person-sized!) statue of Siddhartha in a sitting position. They didn't answer, so I plunked right down on their porch and meditated across from him. It was like sitting there with an actual person, and it was such a fantastic pause in my day.

That might have made my week, right there. Thanks, random house full of strangers I will probably never meet, for giving me a great opportunity to sit and take a moment today. You guys are more awesome than you probably know.

Today I had an excellent surprise. Somebody had a great inspirational quote on their door when I knocked (the one about how we do nobody any favors by diminishing our abilities or accomplishments and shining less brightly than we could), and that made me smile. But there was also a person-sized (person-sized!) statue of Siddhartha in a sitting position. They didn't answer, so I plunked right down on their porch and meditated across from him. It was like sitting there with an actual person, and it was such a fantastic pause in my day.

That might have made my week, right there. Thanks, random house full of strangers I will probably never meet, for giving me a great opportunity to sit and take a moment today. You guys are more awesome than you probably know.

I had a flash of understanding today when advised to be myself when I'm talking at the door. Class clowns have an advantage with concepts like "anatta." We realize more quickly that there is no essential self to be. Who we are when we're alone is no one.