A rare constant?

[xenologer]

No matter how hard or well-defended a person is, nobody enjoys the idea that their friends don't like them anymore. Startlingly little of the sting is taken away by the knowledge that you didn't really like them anymore, either.

I think it doesn't have to do with sadness at the end of a relationship, though the loss of that possibility is sad. It has to do with the way people see themselves. If people don't like you, are you still likeable? If people don't love you, are you still loveable? 

If people misunderstand you, does it matter what the truth is?

Comments

[crysthewolf.livejournal.com]

"If people misunderstand you, does it matter what the truth is?" That's one of those ultimate questions I think.

Anyway I like you (although I don't know that you were personally struggling with the question or if you were just pondering.)

[virginia-fell.livejournal.com]

Personally, a bit.

"you like me, you really like me" --Sally Fields

[cernowain.livejournal.com]

People change, grow, develop new interests-- I guess that's one reason our friends change throughout life.

We all hope for that one friend (or more) that will be there throughout our lifetime. I've not had that, but envy those who do.

I've lived long enough to see old friends come back into my life to become a friend again. That's a wonderful thing. It makes a rather interesting tapestry when friends come in and out and back in your life.

I want you to know that I count myself very fortunate to be considered a friend of yours. You stimulate my thinking, you make me laugh, you listen closely to not only my words but also to my feelings. Because of these things, and others, I value your friendship very much.

bb,

Cern

Re: "you like me, you really like me" --Sally Fields

[virginia-fell.livejournal.com]

Interestingly enough, you're probably the first person who's ever called me a good listener. *laugh* It's something I'm still working on--stopping my mouth long enough to let someone else get a word in edgewise.

Re: "you like me, you really like me" --Sally Fields

[cernowain.livejournal.com]

Maybe you listen to me because my presence is so "intimidating". :)

bb,

Cern

Re: "you like me, you really like me" --Sally Fields

[crysthewolf.livejournal.com]

Ok maybe I'm saying this because we interact online more often than we do in person, but I certainly think you're a good listener. You have a lot to say, certainly, but a) I've never seen you be rude and cut in and b) you ACTUALLY listen/pay attention to what people are SAYING, and not to the one or two words or phrases that can be taken and twisted around and/or used against the point that they're making. Does that make sense?

Lots of people HEAR what other people have to say. Fewer actually LISTEN, but I tend to think of you as one of those.

Re: "you like me, you really like me" --Sally Fields

[crysthewolf.livejournal.com]

Or maybe I just think it's weird and awkard when I say a bunch of stuff and people just say "uh-huh" back (if anything at all.) i tend to think that people who DON'T have a response to me AREN'T listening.'cause if you're talkin' back, it means you're processing.

[nmb86.livejournal.com]

What happened?

[flameraven.livejournal.com]

I think I have to ask this too. Because if it involves someone in the house, I'd like to know rather than guessing at a vague LJ-post. o_o