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Maybe I need someone to bitch to.
It's also possible I wouldn't know what to say to anyone. I'd just as soon drown myself as tell anyone what's bothering me, at least for the most part.
Lithaladhwen: I've been trying to figure out what's wrong with me.
Lithaladhwen: And I think I know.
Lithaladhwen: I.... I'm lonely. It was never something I noticed, but that must be what this is.
Lithaladhwen: I feel like I'm the only person in the world.
Lithaladhwen: That's what that is, isn't it?
Arch mage144: It's one manifestation of it, yes.
Lithaladhwen: I never knew that.
Arch mage144: Never?
Lithaladhwen: No, not really. It didn't bother me. I don't think I understood.
Arch mage144: *nods* I see...
Arch mage144: sorry my responses aren't as quick as they should be...I'm just a little uncertain of how to make you feel better...
Arch mage144: There's nothing I can do, and that bothers me.
Lithaladhwen: *lowers head* I don't mean to make you feel bad. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do with this. There's no right response.
Arch mage144: It's okay, sweetheart...
Lithaladhwen: I don't know what to do!
Lithaladhwen: I hate this!
Arch mage144: >.< I'm sorry...
Lithaladhwen: *emotes that she hates she can't see anything you're doing, and that you can't see her*
One unfortunate side-effect of my approach to life. Learning about emotions... well, it's like chickenpox. If you have it when you're younger, it's not as painful. I got a late start.
To the people who know me at college, this is not who I was. To the people who will understand the analogy, I was much closer to Dawn than I'd be comfortable admitting if I weren't so sure in a few hours or so I won't care either way.
It's only in the past year or two that I've really begun to learn about emotion in earnest. Let me tell you, it's very different to experience emotion as one person than it is to divide up the burden.
There's no real going back. I'm human. That's something I'm going to have to deal with, unsettling though it may be. I'm... like you.
I didn't really believe it was possible, but while I still have the words to say it, I'm going to. I'm like you. We're people. All of us. And I'm one of your number now. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. I had all the old misconceptions about emotion and attachment that seem so silly to most other people. But now I know. I know what I mean when I reference an emotion. Not just as a matter of words, but there's a good chance I've actually experienced it.
I'll be losing that for a while. But I'll be back. Brian promised me that I won't disappear forever. The next couple of months will be rough. I know it. But it's just possible that I may survive it intact.
We'll find out, neh?
It's also possible I wouldn't know what to say to anyone. I'd just as soon drown myself as tell anyone what's bothering me, at least for the most part.
Lithaladhwen: I've been trying to figure out what's wrong with me.
Lithaladhwen: And I think I know.
Lithaladhwen: I.... I'm lonely. It was never something I noticed, but that must be what this is.
Lithaladhwen: I feel like I'm the only person in the world.
Lithaladhwen: That's what that is, isn't it?
Arch mage144: It's one manifestation of it, yes.
Lithaladhwen: I never knew that.
Arch mage144: Never?
Lithaladhwen: No, not really. It didn't bother me. I don't think I understood.
Arch mage144: *nods* I see...
Arch mage144: sorry my responses aren't as quick as they should be...I'm just a little uncertain of how to make you feel better...
Arch mage144: There's nothing I can do, and that bothers me.
Lithaladhwen: *lowers head* I don't mean to make you feel bad. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do with this. There's no right response.
Arch mage144: It's okay, sweetheart...
Lithaladhwen: I don't know what to do!
Lithaladhwen: I hate this!
Arch mage144: >.< I'm sorry...
Lithaladhwen: *emotes that she hates she can't see anything you're doing, and that you can't see her*
One unfortunate side-effect of my approach to life. Learning about emotions... well, it's like chickenpox. If you have it when you're younger, it's not as painful. I got a late start.
To the people who know me at college, this is not who I was. To the people who will understand the analogy, I was much closer to Dawn than I'd be comfortable admitting if I weren't so sure in a few hours or so I won't care either way.
It's only in the past year or two that I've really begun to learn about emotion in earnest. Let me tell you, it's very different to experience emotion as one person than it is to divide up the burden.
There's no real going back. I'm human. That's something I'm going to have to deal with, unsettling though it may be. I'm... like you.
I didn't really believe it was possible, but while I still have the words to say it, I'm going to. I'm like you. We're people. All of us. And I'm one of your number now. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. I had all the old misconceptions about emotion and attachment that seem so silly to most other people. But now I know. I know what I mean when I reference an emotion. Not just as a matter of words, but there's a good chance I've actually experienced it.
I'll be losing that for a while. But I'll be back. Brian promised me that I won't disappear forever. The next couple of months will be rough. I know it. But it's just possible that I may survive it intact.
We'll find out, neh?
